The Lord lives! Praise to my Rock!
    May the God of my salvation be exalted!
He is [El Nekamoth];
    he subdues the nations under me
     and rescues me from my enemies.
You hold me safe beyond the reach of my enemies;
    you save me from violent opponents.
For this, O Lord, I will praise you among the nations;
    I will sing praises to your name.

Psalm 18:46-49

El Nekamoth: God Who Avenges Me (God Who Pays Back Those Who Harm Me)

This might be the characteristic of God that scares me the most – but unlike most fears, it scares me to Him, not away from Him.

Our immediate reaction when we think of payback for those who harm us is just gloating, is it not? “HaHA! Finally they’re gettin’ theirs! Take THAT!” Isn’t that the victory cry of the wronged who have been defended?

But it doesn’t take long for a nagging voice in the back of my head to start bringing things up… does He not defend them, too? The people I have wronged – is He not their just Defender? Will He not pay me back justly, as He has paid them back?

This is when my flight instinct rears. I cannot overpower Him, so I must run – but where? To the only One Who can keep me safe from Him –

Him.

His mercy is my only hope against His vengeance. His perfect sacrifice the only stand-in that can absorb the fullness of His wrath for what I’ve done. El Nekamoth must also be Elohim Chaseddi, or I and everyone are finished.

And I need both of them – both the God of Vengeance and the God of Mercy – because where I have been the victim, I know El Nekamoth is right, and where I have been the sinner, I know Elohim Chaseddi is necessary.

So yes, I fear El Nekamoth. I fear Him enough to flee to Him. Where else can I go?

You will keep in perfect peace
    all who trust in you,
    all whose thoughts are fixed on you!
Trust in the Lord always,
    for [Yahweh Tsuri].

Isaiah 26:3-4

Yahweh Tsuri: The Lord my Eternal Rock

I struggled to keep the passage short for this one because all of Isaiah 26 really should be included. What a beautiful song! When I sat down to study the names of God, I meant to do one each day and be finished by Christmas, and yet here it is, New Years’ Day, and I am only on day 29 of 60. <sigh>. And yet I can’t help feeling blessed to be here, on the first day of this new year, reading and rereading these verses that say trust in Yahweh Tsuri!

He knows what I am, He knows what obstacles to my faith I’ve faced this year, and He knows with what effort we’ve overcome them. He knows how tired I am, tired of picking myself back up with fresh blood and bruises and putting my foot forward again anyway. But He’s also an awful lot taller than me and sees where we’re going; He’s more traveled than I am and He’s been there many, many times before. So He leans down and whispers, “Trust Me, turn your thoughts to Me, keep doing what I tell you to,” and He fills me with strength I didn’t have before.

So here it is, one more breath, one more whisper, one more footstep, one more beginning. One more year with Yahweh Tsuri, the Rock who keeps me in perfect peace!

[Yahweh] is my rock, my [Metsudhathi], and my savior;
    my God is my rock, in whom I find protection.
He is my shield, the power that saves me,
    and my place of safety.

Psalm 18:2

Yahweh Metsudhathi: The Lord my High Tower (Fortress)

I was just talking about safe places with my brother a few days ago. He recently moved his family here from overseas, including his three-year-old daughter, who is, naturally, struggling with the change. He was telling me about how clingy she’s been lately to him specifically; though her mother is there too, she wants him. So I told him what I have always seen – kids run to their mothers when they are hurt or sad. But when they are scared? Scared children want big strong daddy. He makes them feel safe.

I love this name of God because there are days I want to do nothing more than hide. I have, at times, run frantically away and hidden in corners and trees and bathroom stalls and shrunk against walls trying not to be seen. Other times I have pushed up my chin and faced it while my insides clawed frantically for the exit. It’s on those days, all of those days, this God wraps Himself around me and becomes a kind of safety better than hiding would be; He is the power that saves me, my rock, my Yahweh Metsudhathi, the only hiding place I need.

[Yahweh] is my rock, my fortress, and my [Mephalti]; my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety.

Psalm 18:2

Yahweh Mephalti: The Lord My Deliverer (or My Rescuer)

When I began to study fiction writing, the words “character” and “plot” came up together a lot. “Character-driven plot” and “Plot reveals character” are two phrases circulating in my mind tonight. The popular theory goes that the events and circumstances of a character’s journey serve to expose who they are, and in this way I find fiction a lot like life.

One thing the circumstances of my life have certainly exposed in me: I do not like being rescued. It’s embarrassing, inconvenient, and all around frazzling to need to be rescued. I feel like such a weight sometimes, such a burden to my rescuers. Because of this, I ask for help as rarely as I can.

I’ve brought that reluctance to be rescued, that heavy, inconvenient feeling into my relationship with God, and even before Him I try to pretend I have it all together, like He doesn’t have to go out of His way to help me! I don’t want to be a burden, after all.

This bit of my character in fiction would be called a “flaw,” maybe even my “fatal flaw.” The truth is God does not feel burdened by my need to be rescued. Rescuer is His very name; when He rescues me, He is merely being Himself. My weight is nothing to His strength, and my helplessness does not surprise or offend Him. He is waiting, always waiting for me to call Yahweh Mephalti. My Deliverer.

“O [El Sali],” I cry,
    “Why have you forgotten me?
Why must I wander around in grief,
    oppressed by my enemies?”

Psalm 42:9

El Sali: God My Strength (or God My Rock)

Psalm 42 has long been the comfort of drooping souls. “Why am I so discouraged?” “Why is my soul so sad?” David repeats these questions as though they are looping in his mind. This is a man who is low, and he can’t shake it. He feels abandoned, alone, lifeless; I have felt these things too recently, even today. How few of us cannot say the same!

And yet in the midst of this, he calls God El Sali – “God My Strength.” Because he knows. He knows none of his successes ever came from himself anyway; they were all done in strength beyond his own. So he rallies – and again, he puts his hope where it belongs, in El Sali, in his Rock Himself.

The Lord is [Migdal-Oz] for the oppressed,
    a refuge in times of trouble.
Those who know your name trust in you,
    for you, O Lord, do not abandon those who search for you.

Psalm 9:9-10

Migdal-Oz: My Strong Tower (or my Shelter, My Stronghold)

David is exactly the man who would know about shelters, strong towers, safe places. He spent a lot of his life on the run. David was hunted by his own king, by Saul, to whom he continually showed unbelievable loyalty despite. He was the man who confronted Goliath, Goliath the giant, and he spent many years of his life – running? From Saul, who would not confront Goliath but sent a child out in his place? No, David did not run because he was afraid. He ran because Saul was his God-anointed king, and he would not raise a hand against him. Because if Saul found him, he would have to kill or be killed, and he refused to kill the king God had anointed out of reverence for God and God alone. He was convicted to protect a man who wanted to murder him! Oof. He had no choice, not really. He had to run.

One thing David would have known well, then, from his life on the run, were refuges. Safe places where, for a moment, a man could stop running and just live. Safe places, protected places. There were probably precious few of those in his life. But in the midst of the running, he had one safe place, always, that came with him; the place he found peace the most – Migdal-Oz, his Shelter. ❤

“But as for me, I know that [Haggo’el] lives,
    and he will stand upon the earth at last.
And after my body has decayed,
    yet in my body I will see God!
I will see him for myself.
    Yes, I will see him with my own eyes.
    I am overwhelmed at the thought!

Job 19:25-27

Haggo’el: My Redeemer

War cry. This is my war cry! When my faith is failing and needs rallying, these words of Job’s pull power from the dregs of my will. I will. I will see God; I will see him for myself!!

How? How do I know that? Because I know Haggo-el lives; though others may not know that, I do. I am a woman born a slave of the cruelest master, sin, but I will not die its slave. I will be redeemed, bought back, all my debt paid in full by the one with a bottomless purse. He who has the right and the means to buy me back from my captor, Death, lives. My Redeemer, Haggo’el lives. And I will. I will see God; I will see Him for myself! ❤

Then Hannah prayed:

“My heart rejoices in the Lord!
    The Lord has made me strong.
Now I have an answer for my enemies;
    I rejoice because you rescued me.
No one is holy like the Lord!
    There is no one besides you;
    there is no Rock like our God.

“Stop acting so proud and haughty!
    Don’t speak with such arrogance!
For the Lord is [El De’ot];
    he will judge your actions.

1 Samuel 2:1-3

El De-ot: God of All Knowledge

If there is one career I have never, ever desired, it would be that of a judge. Perhaps the most difficult and miserable place I have ever found myself in life is in the middle between two feuding people. Discerning the full and complete truth from the overtly biased pieces and determining what should be done about it – uggghhhh. Let’s everybody just be nice and get along now, mmmk?

The fact is we were never made to judge between others; if we were, we would have been made to know everything. But there is already a Judge who does; why would we need a second?

This is very immediate for me; God is already God, and I do not need to be. He does not need a second. When situations need judging, it is His job, not mine. Reliance on His judgment, the judgment based on real, full knowledge, is my only recourse; I will defer to Him, to El De-ot, The God Who Knows. ❤

Each year Elkanah would travel to Shiloh to worship and sacrifice to [Yahweh Sabaoth] at the Tabernacle. The priests of the Lord at that time were the two sons of Eli—Hophni and Phinehas.

…Hannah was in deep anguish, crying bitterly as she prayed to the Lord. And she made this vow: “O [Yahweh Sabaoth], if you will look upon my sorrow and answer my prayer and give me a son, then I will give him back to you. He will be yours for his entire lifetime, and as a sign that he has been dedicated to the Lord, his hair will never be cut.

1 Samuel 1:3

Yahweh Sabaoth: The Lord of Hosts (or the Lord of Heaven’s Armies)

Why here? This is the question I am asking myself tonight. Why is the Lord referred to as the Lord of Heaven’s Armies here, in this passage in which a soul-battered woman is pleading for relief?

When I think of the Lord of Hosts, I see God before a sea of warrior angels; row after row, battalion after battalion, not a shoulder drooping or a toe out of line. I see Him with no shadow of doubt on His face; He knows just where to employ them, and they follow Him without question. Power radiates from Him, and they shine with it.

So what is He doing here, in an ordinary-for-the-time household, involved in a run-of-the-mill domestic dispute?

Samuel’s mother, Hannah, was one of two wives of a gentle-hearted husband; he loved her deeply, but she could not give him children. His other wife was very fertile – and merciless. Not only did Hannah have the grief of a barren woman to bear, but also the jeering of a rival who would not let her forget it. Ugh. Every time I read her story, I am gutted for Hannah.

I don’t know why she refers to God in this military kind of way. It’s like an action movie hero fell into the plot of a chick-flick drama. Maybe it was just the fashion of the times to address God by this name; who knows? Who knows.

But maybe. Maybe it was because Hannah felt helpless and overpowered, beaten down every day, too small to make it stop; maybe she needed to remind herself someone strong was in her corner, Yahweh Sabaoth, the Lord of Hosts.

Whatever the case, He did – He came – when she called to Him, and not only answered her cry; as He is prone to do, He gave her immeasurably more. She asked for a child, and He gave her Samuel the Prophet, who would stand before kings and rebuke them and exhort them to seek the Lord, plus five more children besides.

I love His heart. I love it so much. That the Lord of Hosts – legions and legions of angels! – would spend His time and His power to mend the heart of one woman! One woman who wanted nothing more in life than to be a wife and a mother. Don’t I know He would do so much for mine? ❤

“So you see, it was the Lord, the God of Israel, who took away the land from the Amorites and gave it to Israel. Why, then, should we give it back to you? You keep whatever your god Chemosh gives you, and we will keep whatever the Lord our God gives us. Are you any better than Balak son of Zippor, king of Moab? Did he try to make a case against Israel for disputed land? Did he go to war against them?

“Israel has been living here for 300 years, inhabiting Heshbon and its surrounding settlements, all the way to Aroer and its settlements, and in all the towns along the Arnon River. Why have you made no effort to recover it before now? Therefore, I have not sinned against you. Rather, you have wronged me by attacking me. Let the Lord, who is [Yahweh Hashapet], decide today which of us is right—Israel or Ammon.”

Judges 11:23-27

Yahweh Hashapet: The Lord is Judge

Israel had been living in the land for three hundred years. No one had questioned their right to be there; they had won it, fair and square, by the will of God. The return policy had long expired, and everyone knew it. So why now?

This was not a matter of setting things right as the king of Ammon had demanded. It was too late for that; the people the land had belonged to then had been long dead, and a new generation had arisen to create their own world. This was a matter of loopholes; the king of Ammon wanted land that belonged to someone else, and so he looked for a way to rationalize taking it. ‘Well, it was ours first,’ was a fair excuse, right?

But Israel had a long memory, too. And knowledge the king of Ammon did not have; the knowledge of who God is. Jephthah, Israel’s judge, knew that it had been Yahweh Hashapet who had given the land to them, and he knew God would not let anyone overturn His decision.

No one may overturn His decision.

God’s ruling stands. It is not anyone’s right to decide but His; it is his very name, Yahweh Hashapet, the Lord the judge. ❤